How Are You Investing In Yourself?

I have a weird relationship with money.

For years, investing in myself was unthinkable. I grew up poor, and I had stayed poor. Money was for buying off-brand food and secondhand clothing, tithing to church, and paying rent (and later mortgage), car payments, and student loan debt. 💸

Anything that COST MONEY sent shockwaves of panic & fear throughout my body, and for decades it was the main factor in all of my decisions. I didn’t travel, didn’t go out with friends, and I borrowed books from the library instead of buying them. I only went to conferences if I could attend for free as a speaker (which is how I started my public speaking career). My husband and I never went on a honeymoon.

Money became this bizarrely sacred-yet-profane entity in my life — I knew I needed money to stay alive (unfortunately, those bills don’t pay themselves), but I was also a religious person who had grown up hearing, “Blessed are the poor” and, “It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.” Wasting money and enjoying money were both sins.

For most of my adult life, I lived in a state of manageable poverty. I had pretty much nothing, and I was pretty okay with it. I still have a secondhand refrigerator and stove, and the desk I’m writing this on cost $10 from the Habitat for Humanity ReStore. They do what I need them to do.

At the time, I didn’t know there was a difference between cost and investment. Both just meant a chunk of my precious, hard-earned money vanished for the short term. But as it turns out, in the long term, you get back the money you invested — and more.

I learned about financial investing when I opened up a mandatory 401(k) with my first “real” job. And later, I learned about investing in myself when I joined my first Mastermind (peer-mentoring) group.

I wanted to feel free. That was the reason I joined the Mastermind. I wanted to start my own business, speak at conferences, and write. But I balked when I learned that money would be a part of that equation. And that I would have to “spend money to make money”.

The thought sent an icy chill down my spine. But soon I began to realize — money was a tool. It wasn’t inherently good or evil, but simply a tool that could help bring results.

The picture you see above is from my very first headshot session. It was one of my earliest investments in myself and it was a hard step for me to take, even though it only (“only”) cost about $100.

Paying for headshots was my first step in investing in myself. Today, that investment continues, and it includes books, podcasting equipment, business travel, working with professional coaches, and taking courses. And it all pays off.

I owe my professional life to being willing to take that first scary step into self-investment. And I owe that willingness to the encouragement of my Mastermind group.

Words & warmth,

Sarah