This is The Write Now Podcast with Sarah Werner, Episode 58: All Of The Best Writing Excuses.

Welcome to Write Now, the podcast that helps aspiring writers and all writers to find the time, energy, and courage you need to pursue your passion and to write every day. I’m your host, Sarah Werner.

We’re going to get kind of real in today’s episode. I’ve never met a writer or a creator, myself included, who didn’t often have excuses as to why they could not create at some time. But the question always is, is my excuse legit? Is this a real reason that I am not able to write at this time? Is this a real reason why I cannot paint or dance or sculpt or what have you at this time? We’re going to answer that today. Actually, it’s kind of funny/ironic because as I was preparing to podcast this evening, everything went wrong. I actually started coming up or coming up against all of these reasons why I couldn’t podcast tonight.

First, I lost my notes. So when I podcast, I don’t read off of a script. I just kind of chat with you here, but I do have some bullet points of things that I want to cover. I couldn’t find that sheet. So I spent a good 20 minutes searching through my admittedly quite messy office and eventually found it, so that was okay. Then I realized, as sweat started pouring down my face, that my office which faces west and the sun is setting right now, is about a zillion degrees. There’s no breeze today, and we don’t have the air conditioning on. I was like, “Oh my gosh, I am literally like, my glasses are sliding off my nose.” Oh, yep. You hear that.

And then as I was thinking that it’s a particularly beautiful and sunny day here in the Midwest and cars have been going up and down my street all day and there’s birds chirping and lawn mowers mowing. I was like, “Oh, I can’t possibly podcast with all these terrible sounds in this terribly hot office.” But I was like, “You know what, Sarah power through it. You can do this. You’ve podcasted in far worse situations than this.”

So then I was all ready to record and I was all set up and I start Audacity, which is the program I use to record my podcast, and I don’t hear anything coming out of my mic when I speak into it. So I went through the whole gamut of all right, do I need to replace the cord? I tested the cord. It still didn’t work. Okay. Is it my headphones? I tested another pair of headphones. That still didn’t work. I even tried another mic. I have a spare mic and I tried my mic and I still couldn’t hear anything.

For me, if it’s not the mic, the cord or the headphones, then it’s either my computer or the software. So I did some tests. It was not the software. And I was like, “Oh my gosh, I cannot afford to buy a new computer right now or have this one fixed,” et cetera, et cetera. So I did a little digging and 40 minutes later, I found out that one of my sound settings had randomly gotten toggled. So I’m really glad that I don’t have to buy any new equipment or anything, but I’m also kind of mad that it’s now an hour-and-a-half later than I wanted it to be. So now that it’s an hour-and-a-half later, I’m like, “Oh my gosh, is it even worth it?” I’ve got the lawn mowers. I’m sweating uncomfortably. My glasses won’t stay up on my nose. I’m frustrated. I’m kind of angry. I had other plans I needed to get to tonight. I was like, “Sarah, how appropriate that you are making all of these excuses about why you can’t podcast during a podcast about excuses as to why you can’t write.”

I am a creature of comfort. Perhaps you are as well. While I don’t live in a golden palace with pillows everywhere and peeled grapes and whatever at my beck and call, I do not like to be uncomfortable. I don’t like to be in pain. I don’t like to be sweaty. I don’t like to be frustrated about how much time I’ve wasted trying to get my mic to work. But at the end of the day, oh, and you can hear someone’s coming up the street on a little motorcycle moped thing. Yeah. You hear that?

So I’m contending with these factors, but none of them are physically keeping me from podcasting. Nothing is actually keeping me from speaking to you from this mic. Sure, this may not be the best episode ever, and it might not be the highest quality episode ever, but you know what? I’m still going to do it because I love talking to you. I love talking to you about writing. I love podcasting, and I’m not going to let all of these other factors stop me from doing what I love.

So with that, let’s jump right into today’s episode and talk about the difference between an excuse and a reason. We’re going to talk about different excuses that keep us from writing. We’re going to talk about all sorts of exciting things. So let’s do this.

So here’s a scenario that might seem familiar to you. At least it’s familiar to me. You come home from work and, ugh, you’re tired and it’s hot outside, or it’s cold outside. You greet your family or you greet an empty apartment and you deal with the whole needing to eat dinner thing or whatever meal it is when you come home. You finally get things cleaned up, or you finally get the kids to bed and you realize, “Wow, I maybe have a little bit of time. I could write.”

But before you indulge yourself in some writing, you think, “All right, I just got to do the dishes real quick, and then I can write. I just have to tidy up my desk first because it’s a huge mess, and then I can write. Or my spouse is watching American Idol and I’ll just finish watching it with him, and then I’ll start writing.” Or, “Shoot. I forgot to take out the trash. I better do that real quick, and then I’ll start writing.” And then maybe you say, “I think I’d write a little better if I had some tea or coffee.” And so you go make tea or coffee, and you come back and you realize you’re not wearing your slippers and you should probably wear your slippers. So you get your slippers.

Then you sit down to write and you realize how cozy and comfy you are now that you have this nice tea and your slippers and you start thinking, “Well, I’m tired. I’ve had a long day. I just did a ton of chores. I washed the dishes and I took out the garbage and made this tea. Boy, am I tired. My writing will still be there tomorrow. Tomorrow is a fresh new day. I’ll write tomorrow.” You go to bed and you try to ignore the feelings that creep in. That rotten feeling. That feeling of being unfulfilled. The feeling that you should have written. The feeling of regret and disappointment.

Now I’m using you here as all inclusive, because I have done this before. In fact, I have probably done it already this week. It’s also hard because there’s such a fine line between a legitimate reason for not writing and an excuse for not writing. So let’s take a look at that.

First, we’ll start off with a reason. So a reason is simply a cause or an explanation. Reasons tends to be logical and non-biased or objective, if you will. So for example, say you’re boarding an airplane and the pilot says, “Hey, ladies and gentlemen, we’re not going to be able to take off on time because our engine is on fire.” I think that is a perfectly good reason for the airplane not to attempt to take off. It makes logical sense. It’s not biased. Nobody’s getting blamed. Maybe someone should get blamed, but the pilot’s not blaming anyone. All right. You can live with this. You’re okay not taking off in your airplane while the engine is on fire. You may be irritated because you’re going to get to your destination late or miss your connection. But it’s a perfectly valid reason.

On the other hand, an excuse is an explanation that justifies or defends a bad decision or a fault. Excuses tend to be illogical and irrational. So using the airplane pilot example again, you’re boarding the airplane and you want to take off on time. The pilot comes over the PA system and says, “Ladies and gentlemen, I apologize. We’re not going to take off on time. My copilot and I shared a room last night and he kept me up all night snoring, and I’m really tired.” That’s when you and the other airline begin exchanging looks with one another because that’s a really lame excuse. Sure, your safety may be at risk, but that pilot has some explaining to do. The plane could easily take off if they were to replace the pilot, if they were to feed the current pilot some caffeinated beverage of some sort.

Or maybe we would feel a little bit better if the pilot who is supposed to be a mature adult in charge of our safety, wasn’t blaming his copilot. Because with excuses, they’re usually blaming someone else for a bad decision that we’ve made or when we’re at fault. So the pilot made the decision not to get a pair of earplugs, not to request a room change. And you know what? Maybe the copilot wasn’t even snoring. Maybe the pilot is hung over and doesn’t want to admit it. Poor pilot. I’m being so mean to him right now. Sorry, dude. But usually you can tell something is an excuse when you can, or someone else can punch a hole in it.

So this plane can’t take off on time because the engine is on fire. It’s really hard to punch holes in that. It’s really hard to say. “Yeah, but you know, can’t you just put the fire out?” Or, “Can’t we just do this Flinstone style and all peddle our feet really hard against the ground and take off that way?” It’s really hard to punch a hole in a logical reason. But with an excuse, an illogical excuse, it’s really easy to say, “But why? But what if? But why?” So, okay, pilot, why didn’t you get a pair of ear plugs? Why didn’t you request a room change? Why didn’t you wake up your copilot and tell him to stop snoring? Why didn’t you have a cup of coffee this morning? Why didn’t you call off? Why didn’t you say you were unable to fly the plane instead of delaying us all? We just have a million questions and that’s when you know they’re making an excuse.

Now the problem here is applying this to ourselves and that’s for a couple of reasons. Number one, because I think we feel like we can justify anything. As writers, we are naturally creative, and so it’s really easy for us to come up with plausible sounding excuses about why we can’t do something such as writing. Also, excuses are easy and responsibility is hard. Writing is hard. Accepting a truth about yourself is hard. Once again, we are incredibly complex people. There is a lot going on in our minds and in our hearts. Sometimes we’re afraid to peel back those excuses because underneath is a truth that we don’t want to admit. Such as, “I don’t want to finish this book because I’m terrified of what happens if my mother reads it.” Or admitting to yourself that writing is not always fun. Sometimes it’s hard work. Sometimes when you come home from a long day of hard work, you don’t want to do a lot more hard work.

There are all sorts of things hidden beneath the surface in every single one of us. Truths that we don’t want to admit, even to ourselves. But, and this is something I never really hear talked about in writerly circles, and I’m not sure why … Maybe because it’s hard to do … But I think one of the most valuable skills that a writer can learn or obtain is being honest with herself or himself. We need to be able to honestly ask what is true and honestly answer what is true. This will help us discern the reasons from the excuses.

So the airline pilot with his excuse of, “My copilot was snoring, and I’m super tired today.” Maybe he actually went out last night and had a little bit too much to drink and is hung over and doesn’t want to admit that. He doesn’t want to admit, “I can’t fly this plane today because I made some very unprofessional and bad decisions last night.” Or maybe he legitimately was stuck in the room with a snoring copilot, and he was just too uncomfortable with confrontation to wake the other guy up and tell him to stop snoring. Or maybe there’s some other reason he didn’t go and get earplugs. A reason based in fear or guilt or shame.

But you know what the wonderful and terrible and yet wonderful thing about this is? We’ve all been there. I have made a lot of really bad choices. Fortunately, none of them have truly defined or changed my life as of yet in a demonstrable way. But I’ve made bad choices, and I’ve faced that guilt and that shame and that fear. We’re human, and we are flawed. No one is perfect. You might be wonderful. I might be wonderful. But neither of us is perfect.

With that in mind, I took the liberty of jotting down some of my favorite writing excuses. What I want to do is play a game. We’re going to ask, is this a reason or is this an excuse? So is this a reason rooted in logic? Is this simply a cause or an explanation for why something could not happen or is it an excuse? Is it an explanation that sort of justifies or defends a fault or a bad decision? Is it illogical? Can we easily punch a hole in it?

Example number one. No one will want to read what I write. Is this a reason that you should not write or an excuse? This is an excuse. There is no way you can logically guarantee that absolutely no one will want to read what you’ve written. It is not a reason not to write. What is this excuse hiding? It could be a number of different things. Fear that your work just won’t be up to your own standard or someone else’s standard. Fear that if and when you publish, no one will buy your book.

I want to say something very clearly that will carry forward throughout the rest of our discussion. That is that fear is a very powerful motivator, and it can motivate you not to write. You can use fear as your reason not to write. You can say, “I’m not going to write because I’m afraid.” It’s honest. But is that what you want? Are you going to let fear keep you from writing? The sad thing is a lot of people do. There are so many amazing novels and biographies and autobiographies and poems and short stories and novellas and nonfiction books that have never been published because of fear. But it’s so interesting being a human being because we have a lot more control than we think we do.

Like right now. I can’t control this guy whose riding his moped up my hill again. But what I can control is I’m going to keep podcasting. Even though sometimes it doesn’t feel like it, you can control your fear. You have free will. You can say, “I know I’m afraid to start writing. But darn it, I’m going to do it anyway. Even if it’s just for me. Even if I never publish. Even if it never sees the light of day. I’m going to write because it brings me joy. And I would so much rather live in joy than in fear.”

Number two. I have a million of these, and I won’t go into such a long diatribe for each one. But number two. I don’t have time to write. Reason or excuse? Well, I can punch a lot of holes in this one. You have 24 hours in a day. The same as me, the same as your boss, the same as your next door neighbor, the same as Stephen King, the same as Cormac McCarthy, the same as Virginia Woolf did. We all have 24 hours in a day, and it’s up to you to rearrange those hours, to schedule and prioritize your time and find the time to write. See, I told you this was going to get all real and harsh. Look at me. Seriously, though, I hope this isn’t hurting your feelings or offending you. What I’m trying to do is help you to understand the difference between excuses and reasons. So I don’t have time to write. Excuse.

Number three. Facebook needs me, or I need Facebook. Reason or excuse? This is an excuse and a particularly flimsy one. There is not probably anyone out there waiting with bated breath for you to publish your next Facebook post or Twitter post or Instagram post or Snapchat or LinkedIn post, or what have you. Facebook does not need you. Get off social media and write.

Here’s another one. I’m too old to start writing. Reason or excuse? This is an excuse. Unless complications have made it so it is not physically possible for you to write. You are not too old. If you want to feel inspired about this, go back and listen to the episode I recorded with Jay Greenfield, the 84-year-old first-time novelist. He’ll help you break through that excuse. What about I’m too young to write. Excuse or reason? I think you can see where I’m going with this. That one’s an excuse as well. You are never too young to create. If you’re listening to this and you are 16 years old, go back and listen to the episode I recorded with author Mark Messick, who is 16 years old and had, I think at the time when I interviewed him, published, I don’t know, like 11 books or something. You’re not too young. Even if you’re listening to this and you’re seven years old or five years old, you know you can write. You can tell a story even if you need a little bit of help.

What about I need to wash the dishes. Reason or excuse? I’m going to say this one’s an excuse as well. Unless there is some kind of unhinged Mafia member holding a gun to your head and forcing you to wash the dishes. You can leave them. You can leave them overnight. I’ve done it. The dishes will be there the next morning. They can wait.

What about this one? I can’t write because I don’t have the right education. I don’t have an MFA. Or I never took a creative writing class in high school or college. Or I never went to college. Or I don’t have a Master’s Degree. Reason or excuse? Again, this one’s an excuse. If you have the ability to hold a pen or pencil in your hand and form letters on paper, you can write. Now you may not write as well as you want to. You may not know all of the fancy terms for what you’re doing. You might not know what an illusion is or a metaphor and that’s okay. Those are not legitimate reasons not to write. In fact, I am 100% convinced that the absolute best way to learn how to write is to write and to read. You have books available to you. There’s free classics online. There’s a library probably in the town or city where you live.

I wonder if you’re listening to this right now if you’re mad at me. I think it’s okay if you are. If I’ve said that your favorite reason for not writing is an excuse and that you should be writing anyway, I think it’s okay to be angry at me. And hey, if you’re looking for something to write about, if you’re stuck and one of your excuses is I don’t have anything to write about, then you can write me an email. My email address is hello@sarahwerner.com. That’s S-A-R-A-H W-E-R-N-E-R.com. You can tell me they are angry with me for saying that the reason you don’t write is an excuse, and then that’ll get you started writing. And that will be awesome. I would love for you to do that.

I have a whole list here of excuses/reasons. How about this one? I’m out of coffee. This one is an excuse and it’s easily remedied. Go make some more coffee. If you are out of coffee, go to the store and purchase coffee. If it is a blizzard outside and you don’t have a car, then either have a friend bring you some coffee or try writing without it.

How about this one? I have nothing original to say. I actually hear that a lot. Is this a reason or an excuse? On the outside it sounds pretty legit. Like, oh, okay. You don’t have anything to say. Oh, okay. But when it comes to labeling this as an excuse or a reason, it’s an excuse. Just because you don’t think you have anything original to say, or just because you think you don’t have anything to say at all is not a reason to not write. Pick up your pen and write anyway. I think you’d be really surprised at what comes out. Also, if you’re concerned about having nothing original to say, go back and listen to Write Now, Episode 42. I think you’ll enjoy it.

Here’s another one I hear a lot. Oh, Sarah, I can’t write. My spelling and my grammar are really terrible. Reason or excuse? That’s right. Excuse. This is what editors are for. You tell your story. They’ll fix all of those mechanical things. I want to make sure that I’m not making light of any of these situations that I’ve labeled as excuses. A lot of the times they’re really legit. I was so angry earlier at all the noises, at my technical difficulties, but when it came down to it, when I asked is there anything objectively, logically keeping me from creating a podcast episode right now, the answer was no. I had a lot of excuses and they were good excuses, but they were still excuses.

We’ll do a few more. Reason or excuse? Publishers today only publish garbage. Is that a reason not to write or an excuse? I think you know what I’m going to say. It’s an excuse. Somebody else’s opinion, somebody else’s grasp on the market, somebody else’s writing that you don’t like should never be a factor in whether or not you sit down and create what you were meant to create.

How about this one. Reason or excuse? I just got off of a 12-hour shift, and I have a newborn baby at home. Reason or excuse?I think this one is the first one in the list so far that I interpret as a reason. You have a demanding job and a newborn baby. This is maybe not the season for writing. But once the baby gets a little older, you can go back to trying to wedge writing into your life. But for now that serves as a very valid reason. You are being pulled too thin. No one would blame you if you could not write right now.

What about this one? I’m writing a historical novel, and I just need to do a ton more research before I can continue. Ergo, I can’t write right now. Reason or excuse? This is where the line begins to get a little blurry. I would say that this for now is an excuse because you can always plow ahead, write, and go back and fix the historical details later. It should not keep you from writing.

What about this one? I’m undergoing chemo and I am fricking exhausted and in pain. Reason or excuse? This is a reason. However, don’t let that stop you from writing if you think that writing could be a healthy or healing exercise. Or how about, Sarah I’m exhausted? Life is just beating me down. Before saying that this is a reason or excuse, I would ask a question. And that is, are you legitimately too exhausted to write? If you say no, it’s an excuse. But if you say yes, then it’s time to rest. Rest is okay. Self care is okay.

That’s something that I wrestle with myself a lot, and I hear a lot of other writers wrestling with. That is this notion that if you don’t write every free moment that you have, then you’re not actually a writer. That is not true. You are still a writer. Even if you only write once a week. Even if you only write once a month. No one can take that title away from you. Nobody can tell you you’re not a writer. If you need to take care of yourself, do not sacrifice your health and well-being to churn out writing. I feel like I need to say that for perspective.

So when you’re taking a look at your own situation and you’re daring to ask yourself, is this an excuse or is this a reason, I want you to use your incredibly valuable writer’s skill or begin to develop the incredibly important writing skill of being honest with yourself. Because ultimately only you can make that call. Only you can know. Yeah, I’m just putting off my writing because I’m afraid. Or, I am legitimately too in pain and too exhausted to write. Only you can know that. Only you have the power to assess your situation and be completely honest with yourself.

I feel like we as writers have, I don’t know if I want to call it a gift or a special life bonus, and that is we get a unique opportunity to reflect upon our own lives and to understand ourselves more deeply than a lot of other people. Because so much writing is self exploration. So if you’re having trouble figuring out whether the thing that’s keeping you from writing is an excuse or a reason, maybe journal it out. Write to figure it out or talk it over with a good friend. It doesn’t even have to be another writer.

I just want you to understand and remember at the end of the day, that we’re not perfect, that we all fall back on excuses sometimes. That sometimes it’s a lot more attractive or fun or entertaining to binge Netflix and eat cookie dough than it is to sit down in front of that manuscript that you’ve been slaving away over and work out that scene that’s so problematic. Or to make yourself hit the delete key from that 700-word paragraph that you know doesn’t belong there. Sometimes it’s easier to go to bed and make the excuse that you’re too tired to write than it is to face the demons that are clashing inside your mind. That want to come out on paper. Be honest with yourself. Ask yourself what is true of your situation. If you can by any means write, then write.

It takes a lot of people invested in what I’m doing here to keep the Write Now Podcast going. Many of these people give me emotional support. Some of these people write books that bring me joy. Some of these people are my family and friends. Some of these people are my Patreon supporters, and they help support this podcast financially by helping to cover hosting costs, equipment costs, and all of the other fun, fun costs that are associated with podcasting.

Patreon is a secure third-party donation platform that lets you pledge $1 per episode, $2 per episode, $3 per episode, whatever you feel like this is worth to you. I never charge Patreons for more than four posts a month, even if I come out with some bonus episodes. So if you are pledging $1 per episode, you only ever get charged $4 for the month. So this is something you’re interested in doing, you can go out to patreon.com, that’s P-A-T-R-E-O-N.com. Or you can go to sarahwerner.com/patreon. P-A-T-R-E-O-N. That will direct you to my Patreon page.

Special thanks go to official cool cats, Sean Lock and Rebecca Werner, official bookworms Matthew Paulson and Lillith Black, official rad dudes, Andrew Coons and the Sioux Empire Podcast, and official caffeine enablers, Barbara Miller, Colleen Cotolessa, and War Writer. Thank you all so, so much for your gracious and generous support of this show. I couldn’t do this without you.

As we wrap up here, I’m curious to know what is your favorite writing excuse or what is the best or worst one you’ve ever heard? I would love to hear from you. If you want, you can email me at hello@sarahwerner.com or you can also go to my website and navigate to the contact page and leave me a message there. You can also go to the show notes for this episode out at sarahwerner.com. Scroll down to the comments and let me know your thoughts. So I would love to hear from you.

One of my favorite parts about podcasting is getting to chat and make friends with you. So let me know what you’re thinking. Let me know what excuses really just get you. I think that’ll be a very interesting discussion. So I look forward to it.

With that, after this very, very long evening of noises and technical difficulties, this has been Episode 58 of the Write Now Podcast, the podcast that helps aspiring writers and all writers to find the time, energy and courage you need to pursue your passion and to write every day. I am Sarah Werner, and I just realized I am late to my Sunday night write-along. So I will see you later.