Are there any absolutely universal writing rules? In this week’s episode, we’re taking a look at not only writing advice but the context surrounding it. Because context is important!

I’m the type of person who always wants to do things the “right” way — and maybe you are, too. I want to know that the time and energy I’m putting forth into my creative work is well spent. The writing rules I’ve learned over the years — from primary through high school, college classes, books, and online courses/resources — are geared to help us create the “right” way.

But is there a “right” way to create? Is there an objectively “correct” path?

Over the years, I’ve become increasingly uncomfortable insisting there is just one “right” way to do things. I’ve had to do a lot of experimentation to find a writing method and schedule that actually work for me. And not all of the advice I’ve received has been good advice. Some of it has even set me back, or clashed with what I need to do my best creative work.

Here’s the thing — we’re all extraordinarily different in a thousand different ways.

“Bulletproof advice” that works for a writer with a neurotypical brain may not work at all for someone with ADHD.

“The right way” to write might work for someone who is independently wealthy, but not for a single parent working two jobs.

We don’t even all create for the same reasons — some people want to write for fun whenever the mood strikes, while others enjoy a disciplined approach. For some people, writing success means satisfaction and contentment with their work, and for others it means a Hollywood deal.

And crucially: one is not better than or superior to the other. We’re allowed to write and create for our own reasons, our own goals, and our own versions of success.

I recall the first time I read Stephen King’s On Writing — a wonderful resource for any writer. The book, in explaining Stephen King’s outlook and processes regarding a writing practice, established a set of “rules” for writers. Stephen King writes every day, and enjoys a large amount of success. It’s easy to extrapolate that since Stephen King writes every day, no matter what, so should we.

But not all of us can write every day. Not all of us — in fact, I’d wager very few of us — have the same context as Stephen King. We don’t have his brain, his experience, his connections, his money, his family life, his resources, his unique quirks, etc. What works for him might not work for us.

And that doesn’t make us failures. It just means that we need to respect our own context to find a way to write that works for us.

Context is important. I grew up in the ’80s and ’90s, and during that time there was this whole food pyramid guideline thing where you were supposed to eat six to 12 servings of bread or starch a day. That’s what your diet was supposed to be based on. Years later, we realized, hey, maybe I shouldn’t be eating just bread forever. Maybe that food pyramid came from a context that I didn’t understand — for example, maybe a bunch of lobbyists from the various grain industries paid a lot of money for Americans to base their diet on bread and grain and starch. Maybe that food pyramid wasn’t in the best interest of our health, but in the best interest of the economy, or in the best interest of someone else’s pocket. Context matters.

Not every “rule” or “best practice” will serve you, and it’s up to you to experiment and discern what actually works for your own unique context.

When do you feel the best? When do you feel the happiest and the most fulfilled in your creative work? When do you feel like you are moving toward your own definition of success? Because it all seems incredibly relative.

What Do You Think?

I’m curious — what do you think? Are one-size-fits-all writing rules largely subjective and relative, or are there any absolute musts (or must-nots)? Is anything “guaranteed”? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments (below the full episode transcript)!

Support The Show

I make The Write Now Podcast for free, on my own time & my own dime, so that anyone, anywhere can enjoy it. If you’d like to support the work I’m doing, please consider becoming a patron over on Patreon! Thank you!

Support The Show

I make The Write Now Podcast for free, on my own time & my own dime, so that anyone, anywhere can enjoy it. If you’d like to support the work I’m doing, please consider becoming a patron over on Patreon! Or, if you prefer, you can also support me on Ko-Fi or via PayPal. 🙂 Thank you!

Full Episode Transcript (click to expand!)

This is the Write Now podcast with Sarah Werner, Episode 142: No Rules, Just Write.

Welcome to Write Now, the podcast that helps all writers, aspiring, professional, and otherwise to find the time, energy, and courage you need to pursue your passion and write. I’m your host, Sarah Werner. And yes, I am aware that today’s podcast title is a pun or just straight up lifting the tagline for a commercial steakhouse.

But I want to talk today about what we perceive as rules for writing. I know as somebody who always wants to do things the correct way because, yes, I am that person. I’m just going to fully admit it right here to you, right now. That’s the name of the podcast, speaking of puns. Wow, I am on a roll today my friends.

Well, okay. So I want to do everything correctly. I want to do everything right. And I think a lot of us share that sentiment to some degree. We don’t want to waste our time doing something the wrong way, right? We don’t want to put together a piece of furniture only to realize we’ve put the legs on backwards or upside down, and nobody can sit in this chair and we have to unbuild it so that we can rebuild it. Right? That’s a waste of time. It’s a huge hassle. And it’s a waste of energy that could have been better spent doing something else, doing something correctly or more productively or more efficiently.

Ever since I became self-employed, I have been terrified of wasting my time because time is the most valuable thing that I have. It is a non-renewable resource and once it’s gone, it’s gone. I like my time to be well spent. And perhaps ironically, this is why I spend a lot of time looking into ways to do things the correct way. So I invest time at the beginning so I don’t waste time later. You know what? Maybe it all comes out as a wash, but happily, today’s Write Now podcast episode is not about saving or wasting time. It is about doing things the “right way,” or what we are told is the right way, or what we have learned is the right way, or what we are in the process of learning is the right way.

I read a lot of self-help and how-to books. I take a lot of courses, because, well, I love learning first of all. I love filling up my brain. But something that I’ve learned through all of this learning is that sometimes there are contradictory “correct ways” to do things, whether it’s two experts disagreeing with each other, or whether it’s your own experience disagreeing with the thing that you are learning or being taught.

Six years ago, yes six whole years ago, I recorded an episode of the Write Now podcast, episode number 39, called “The Worst Writing Advice”, in which I asked people what is the worst writing advice you’ve ever received? And I think the number one piece of advice that people cited there was the whole “write what you know” thing because it was very limiting, et cetera. You can go listen to the episode if you want. I don’t even know what I sounded like six years ago. It was a whole different world then. Mostly, I just can’t believe this show is that old.

But today, I’m not talking about just bad writing advice. I am talking about the concept of writing advice and writing rules, because I realized something. In December 2021, I released a, I don’t know if I want to call it a bonus episode of the Write Now podcast, it was more just an announcement. And I think the title of it was simply “A Quick Announcement”. And I talked about how I’m no longer comfortable telling people what to do, telling people how to write, because I believe that there are millions of different ways to write and to publish and to create and to find success and to find satisfaction and to find fulfillment.

This largely stems from the fact that we don’t all create, so we don’t all write or paint or draw or quilt for the same reason. Some people write because they are compelled to write. If they don’t write, they get sick, they get depressed. They need to do it for their health or for some internal compulsion. Some people write because they want to get published. They want to hold in their hands a tangible copy of their book and turn the pages and see the ink on those pages and see their name on the front cover as the author. Some people write to create a safe space for themselves or for others. Some people write just to process life. Some people write to make a ton of money. And there is no judgment with any of these. You can write or create for whatever reason you want. Isn’t that beautiful? You want to be famous? Write a famous book? Awesome. I mean, it might be hard, but that’s your reason.

In addition to there being so many different reasons to write, people also have different definitions and versions of what success means for them as a creative individual. For some people, success means their name on a billboard. For some people, success means enough money to quit their day job. For some people, success means the quiet feeling of satisfaction when you type “the end” at the end of a novel. So with all of these different reasons for writing and definitions of success, I would argue that there really aren’t any universal rules for writing, or at least there’s a lot fewer than we accept there to be. Obviously, if you never write any words down, you will never get those words published. I feel like that’s, okay that’s maybe universal. If you don’t make stuff, you will not have made stuff.

But when I ask other writers for advice, or when I read a book on the craft, or when I fill out a workbook, not everything applies to me. And I’ve had to realize that over years and actually decades of writing, sometimes the good advice that works for some people is not good advice for other people. The advice to write every day no matter what. I picked that up initially from Stephen King’s On Writing, we’ll say several years ago. Oh gosh, I think it’s been over 20 years since I read that book. Anyway, I remember being so enamored and so impressed and thinking, “Well, if Stephen King is so famous and has written so many books and is so beloved by so many people, if I just follow his rubric or whatever you want to call it, his rule system, then I too, I too will find success.”

Now, there are a lot of things in that book that are true, but there are also a lot of things in that book that, while true for Stephen King and maybe some other writers out there, perhaps yourself included, simply do not work for me. It’s also good to take someone else’s method with a little bit of salt, a grain or two or 10. So yes, Stephen King writes I think 364 days a year or something like that, but it is feasible for him to do that because of how he has structured his life. No one’s going to have the same journey as Stephen King. You’re on your own journey, and you have to respect that it’s different from his. Also, another giant grain of salt. Stephen King was doing a whole lot of drugs while he was writing some of his most famous novels. He doesn’t even remember writing several of his books.

When we think about another writer’s methods, we have to think about it in the context of their entire life: their past, their present, their context. You can’t just select one behavior or one nugget from another writer’s routine and say, “Oh, Stephen King wrote every day. Stephen King is wildly successful. Therefore, if I write every day, if I take that one method from Stephen King, I too will be wildly successful.” And that’s just not how it works.

There are so many extenuating circumstances. There are the people who Stephen King knew, the people that he met through the writing process, the editors and the agents. There are people who taught him things that he did not pass on. Maybe he felt that they were intrinsic. Maybe he forgot to pass them on. There’s still a lot there that we don’t know. There are other things that may have fueled his writing. I don’t know if he writes for the same reason that I do. I don’t know if his version of success is the same as mine. What I want for you is your life and your reasons for writing, and your version of success, and your own feelings of satisfaction and fulfillment with the writing process.

Now, taking a step back, Stephen King wrote 364 days a year. That’s sheer volume. Objectively, like we said earlier, you can’t get published if you don’t have words to publish. So, write words or just write. They don’t even maybe have to be words. I don’t know. I don’t judge your writing. I don’t know what you write in. I write in words. You might not. If you want to publish words, you need to have words to publish. I think that maybe that is my only universal writing rule. I don’t know. I want to think about that a little bit. But I think this context is important.

I’m a Millennial, and I grew up during the 80s, 90s, 2000s, et cetera. And during that time, the works of Joss Whedon were very integral to my life and my development as a creative person. I fell in love with “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” and watched every single season multiple times. I was astounded by “Firefly”. I just thought his writing was magical. And, like I had done with Stephen King 10 or more years before that, I said, “Okay, I want to look at his process. I want to look at the milestones he hit.” Was I comparing myself? Yes. But we’ve talked about comparison before as well.

But, I looked at these milestones and I said, “Okay, Joss Whedon was running his own show by this age. Okay, and then he was directing and writing for Marvel movies at this age. Okay.” So created for myself a rubric of success based on someone else. And I said, “Well, you know what? I’m going to say something nice about myself as a writer. I think I’m kind of talented. And I think that, I don’t want to say I’m as talented or more talented than Joss Whedon, but I think I can do what he did. I think I can emulate his success.”

Bold, I know. I took his writing advice. I worked hard. Hilariously, one of his pieces of advice was even “don’t listen to other people’s advice.” But then I figured out some context. I figured out that Joss Whedon and I started in very, very different places. Joss Whedon’s dad wrote on several TV shows, including the Golden Girls. His grandfather wrote on the Andy Griffith Show, and even Joss Whedon himself had a staff writing position on Roseanne in his mid-twenties. What was I doing in my mid-twenties? I was working at a bank where I had to wear panty hose every day, daydreaming about the day that I would get out of that job and be able to start writing. And I was working for a marketing agency where all of my creativity and good ideas and energy went toward other people’s marketing campaigns and not to my own creative work.

I also realized years later that apparently Joss Whedon was not maybe a great person. I don’t want to get hit for slander or anything, but Joss Whedon has maybe done some things that I myself would not want to do in my own writing career. First and foremost, being the way that he treats other people, especially women. With this context, I went from wanting to emulate this person, to kind of being disgusted with him. Now, does this render Joss Whedon’s writing advice null and void? Not necessarily. People are very complex, and even people who do terrible things might understand some kernels of truth. And those kernels of truth might still be useful.

I know a lot of us have been struggling with that lately. We find out that maybe a writer we admire or a creator we admire whose work we love has maybe done some shady things in the past. And then we’re like, “Oh my gosh. Well, do I stop reading their work entirely? Do I no longer enjoy their work? Is their work really no longer valid?” I’m not going to answer that question here because I think that that’s something you need to answer and decide for yourself. But the question is there. And the context is there. Sometimes we can receive good advice from terrible people, and sometimes we can receive terrible advice from very nice and well-meaning people.

As I said earlier, I grew up in the 80s and 90s, and during that time there was this whole food pyramid thing where you were supposed to eat six to 12 servings of bread or grain a day. That’s what your diet was supposed to be based on. Years later, we realized, hey, maybe I shouldn’t be eating just bread forever. Maybe that food pyramid came from a context that I didn’t understand. Maybe a bunch of lobbyists from the corn and wheat and maybe some other industries paid a lot of money for Americans to base their diet on bread and grain and starch. Maybe that food pyramid wasn’t in the best interest of our health, but in the best interest of the economy, or the best interest of someone else’s pocket.

Advice and rules and regulations are everywhere. I know because I read them and I see them and I pay to take classes. And along with the sales material, there’s always a guarantee or a promise that this is the right way. This is the correct way to do this. If you do things this way, it’ll guarantee that you don’t make any missteps. It’ll guarantee that your time and energy won’t be wasted. And they’re not lying. They make those claims because that method worked for them. But I don’t think every method works for everyone. Just because something works for you, Stephen King, does not mean that it will work for me, because we are complicated, weird, different people with vastly different backgrounds and relationships and opportunities.

I think it’s really easy for us to be really egocentric and to say, oh, because this worked for me, it will work for you. I have probably an embarrassing number of old Write Now podcast episodes where I say, “Hey, this is the way that you can do this, or this is the way that you should do this.” And I don’t want you to stop listening, or I don’t want you to not listen. I mean, for one, it’s my show and of course I want you to listen to it. But I don’t want you to listen to it and follow it to the letter and expect success necessarily.

What I think I would like you to do is learn a lot of different pieces of advice. Read widely, learn from a lot of people, and take what works for you and leave what doesn’t. Experiment. See what works for you. When do you feel the best? When do you feel the happiest and the most fulfilled? When do you feel like you are moving toward your own definition of success? Because, it’s all relative. It’s all deeply subjective. And I think that’s frustrating for a lot of us, especially rule followers like me. I’m like, no, no, no. Just give me a rule to follow. Give me someone else’s patented path to success. And I will just follow that and I will be so happy.

Unfortunately, especially creatively speaking, that does not exist. Other people’s best and most beautiful and most kind-hearted writing advice might not work for you and it might not work for me, just because we’re different people. The advice I received to write every day no matter what did not work for me, and I had to learn that over several decades. Someone else’s writing advice to me was just write a thousand words every day, or just write a thousand words five times a week. And that writing advice did not work for me. Maybe someone like myself told you to just set small word count goals, like 200 words a week, and maybe that did not work for you.

I’m not saying any of this advice is wrong. I’m just saying that it’s all relative. And you have to figure out what works for you and your needs and your vision of success and your context and your lifestyle. Some people are real word warriors, and they can just crank out pages, from a terrible first draft to a beautiful third draft. Other people struggle to get 10 words onto the page and edit as they go. That was always one of the things that I was told never to do. Write a terrible first draft. You can always edit it later. I’ve tried doing that for yeah, actual decades. And what I found is that I make the most progress and I find the most satisfaction in writing by essentially starting on the third draft. I write slowly, I write carefully, and I keep moving forward increments at a time.

And the pages don’t fly out of my typewriter, not that I write on a typewriter. But progress gets made, and at the end of it, I have a story that I’m proud of. My method is just a little bit different than what I’ve been told to do. Some people love writing toward deadlines, other people love a slow and steady pace. Some people like to work on one project at a time, other people like to have multiple projects in the air. Some people love to plan and outline, other people like to write by the seat of their pants. And again, none of these methods are objectively right or objectively wrong.

You might disagree with me. This is my opinion, and if you disagree with me, that is wonderful actually. I would love to hear your own thoughts. If you go out to SarahWerner.com and locate the show notes for this episode, this is episode 142, I have a comment section at the bottom of my show notes and I love to hear from listeners like you. So if you think I am extremely wrong and that there are objective writing rules that should be followed, I would love to hear from you because I’m always interested in what other people have to say.

I’m just talking about my own experience here. And my own experience has been that some things work for me and other things which are “guaranteed to work for me” simply do not work. And you might have found something similar for yourself. Maybe you thrive on five and a half hours of sleep instead of the recommended eight to nine. Maybe rewards don’t entice you, and all you want to do is sit and write. You don’t need to get a certain number of words in before you have a cookie or a slice of cake. Maybe you hire a writing coach. Maybe you don’t. Maybe a strict writing schedule helps you produce. Maybe a strict writing schedule sends you running in the opposite direction screaming.

My thought today is that there is no correct way to write. There are only ways that work for you personally, as an individual with your unique set of circumstances and personality quirks and habits and your lifestyle. And I’m saying this because I don’t want you to feel bad or less of a writer if you don’t follow what other people have deemed to be very important rules. Like sure, if you write every day and you see the at Stephen King writes every day, that’s a nice little feeling of validation like, oh, I’m doing a good thing. But that’s not the only way to be a writer. A solution for me is not necessarily a solution for someone else. And I really want to recognize and respect that.

So I’m curious. I want to know, what are your rules for writing? What is your favorite advice about writing? And where did you get it? Where did you learn it? And do you share it with people? And do they follow it? I’m so curious about how we all teach and influence each other. And I’m wondering if there is some advice that did not work for you. If there is some so-called universal piece of writing advice that simply does not work for you. And even some “hard and fast rules” you might think of such as one space after a period or two spaces after a period, or to use the Oxford comma or to not use the Oxford comma. There are people who would argue it both ways, people who grew up in different eras or have different context, people who are writing academic papers versus people who are writing for a newspaper or a journal.

We have been taught so many things, and I think it’s a really good idea to take a moment and stop and reflect on them, and to think about what is serving me, what is actually helping me to write and to create, and what is getting in the way? It is so wonderful to record episodes of the Write Now podcast, and to have this conversation with you about your craft and your passion. So again, I would love to hear your thoughts in the show notes for today’s episode. You can scroll down to the bottom and find where it says, submit a comment, and let me know your thoughts. I do respond to every comment that I receive on my website. Again, that’s SarahWerner.com. That’s S-A-R-A-H-W-E-R-N-E-R.com. And this is episode 142. I would love to hear your unique perspective.

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And with that, this has been episode 142 of the Write Now podcast, the podcast that helps all writers, aspiring, professional, and otherwise, to find the time, energy, and courage you need to pursue your passion and write. I’m Sarah Werner, and I’m looking forward to seeing you again, except I’m not going to see you, I’m going to speak to you, in the next episode.