I feel like all of my best realizations come when I’m talking things out with a good friend, preferably over coffee, and I’d like to share one of them with you today.
I was having a heart-to-heart via Zoom with my friend Rebecca last week, during which I mentioned an ongoing frustration: I work really hard and am constantly improving my life and craft, so why am I never satisfied with myself? Why can’t I celebrate the (figurative) mountain I just climbed? Why am I always surveying the horizon for the next mountain instead?
I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately because I’ve been listening to several Enneagram podcasts. I’m a 3 (wing 2), and a big fault/problem/stumbling block with 3s is that we’re never just content to enjoy and exist within the present moment — we’re always looking ahead to what’s next.
This bothered me, and I started to think about everything I was missing. I started thinking about how I could fix this problem, how I could stop being the way that I am — the way that I’ve been my entire life. And whether or not you’re an Enneagram 3, whether or not you struggle with this same frustration, I hope that Rebecca’s response is as helpful to you as it was to me.
“What if you’re a visionary?” she asked. “What if you’re not supposed to be satisfied? What if you have a freakin’ imagination?”
Woah. Suddenly I went from ungrateful, joyless problem-haver to someone with vision who refuses to settle. I didn’t change at all — but the way I perceived myself did.
It’s so easy for us to find faults with ourselves, to harshly judge those perceived “faults”, and to spend a lot of time looking for ways to fix or solve them.
But what if it’s not actually a problem? What if you’re looking at one of your strengths through a cracked or clouded lens? What if you’re a visionary?
Words & warmth,
Sarah