I feel like life has been tough for a lot of us lately. I’ve been attempting to balance priorities and obligations and it hasn’t been going very well.
I hope this doesn’t sound too complain-y, or like a big ol’ pile of first-world problems, but running your own business is hard. It’s worth it, of course, if you don’t want anyone else telling you what to do, but sometimes… having to be the source of all decisions and responsibility and motivation can get a little exhausting.
That being said, I still wouldn’t trade it for anything — I’ve found myself considering it and every single time, I realize that I could not go back to working for someone else. The micromanaging, the unreasonable and dehumanizing policies, the nonsensical bureaucratic red tape, the unnecessary meetings and constant interruptions, the emphasis of being (or seeming) busy over anything meaningful or truly innovative… never again.
Anyway, I found myself struggling not only with my workload management but with depression over these past several weeks, and had a really good conversation with my friend Sean about it. (You can listen to it here, if you like.) We talk about feeling broken, seeking treatment, and lots of other great stuff that I hope you find insightful or helpful, or both.
As I continue to figure out LIFE (which I hear is some sort of lifelong journey), I keep running into increasingly baffling paradoxes. Running my own business is the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but I wouldn’t for a second go back to being employed by someone else. I’m depressed a lot of the time, but I would still consider myself a happy person. The more I learn, the more I realize I don’t know. Nothing gold can stay, and there is beauty in both light and dark. Life isn’t easy, but it is good. Add your own paradox(es) here.
I’m not 100% sure what to do with these paradoxes — do we wrestle with them, reconcile with them, meditate upon them…? I’ve been exploring them recently in my creative work, pulling at the strands to see how they’re intertwined, and which truths within them (if any) are actual truths. But it’s hard. Like running a business, like tackling a creative project, like fighting back against depression, it’s hard. Like all worthwhile things.
Words & warmth,
Sarah
P.S. My Podcast Now course was going to re-launch Tuesday, June 1, but due to a combination of technical difficulties and human error (mine), I’m going to reset that date. I’ll keep you posted on when that’s going to be. 🙂 In the meantime, enjoy my free webinar, chock full of tips and tricks to help you create a seriously successful podcast.